Think about the people you spend the most time with. Are they adding to or subtracting from your life? Is there anyone who, after you interact with them, you feel consistently drained or negative? Everyone has bad days, but do you have someone in your life who is always complaining?If you have energy vampires around you, maybe consider addition by subtraction. Sometimes boundaries have to be set for people you interact with to keep them from sucking your emotional energy.
Most of us do not have unlimited energy and we need to be careful how we give our energy away and who we give it to. Be selective with who gets your time. We are the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with. We don’t have control over who we must interact with like family or co-workers or a boss.
The people we spend our time with are important. Its helpful to surround yourself with positive, supportive people especially when you are trying to make a life changes. Having an accountability buddy, someone with similar goals that you can check in with can help you reach your goals. Having a buddy with similar goals can also help protect you when you fall down. When you are also in charge of keeping someone else accountable it helps you stick to your goals, too.
Its also good to take some time to reflect on what kind of friend you are. Are you supportive of your friends? Are you there for them when they need you? Do you emotionally dump on them without giving in return? As women sometimes we have difficulty being direct or asking for what we want. Are you being passive aggressive or are you not feeling heard? There is always room for self-reflection and improvement for all of us.
Please like this post if you found it helpful for you.
# 1 BREATHE
The first thing people do when they are stressed
out or anxious is to stop breathing. Our breath has
a direct link to our nervous system. When we are
breathing deeply and regularly its impossible to
feel stressed out. Put your hand on your belly and
breathe in deeply until you make your hand move
and keep breathing slowly and deeply to calm
yourself down. Breathe in for a slow count of 5,
hold it for 5 and then exhale for 5. Repeat for 5
minutes 3x/day or as frequently as you need to.
Give people some grace and practice some radical
forgiveness. Holding a grudge is like drinking
poison and expecting the other person to die.
Don’t forget to forgive yourself. We’re all under a
lot of stress and pressure right now and we all
deserve grace. Hey, that means even you.
If you are by yourself right now, it might be hard to
reach out to others but I urge you to take that step.
Think of 3 people you can keep in touch with daily
by text, phone or facetime and reach out. I’m sure
they would love to hear from you. If we all did this
no one would be alone. And people stuck in the
house with annoying family members? Reach out
to your friends or family who are at home alone.
This is one of my favorite ways to change my
perspective when I’m stuck. Make a list of 10 things
you’re grateful for and read it over several times a
day. It might be something as simple as I’m alive
or there is a roof over my head to start with but I’m
sure once you start writing you will find out there’s
Find a way to have fun and laugh. There’s tons of
funny movies on Netflix. Maybe zoom with some
friends and have a virtual happy hour with your
favorite beverage. Try a light audiobook or
podcast. Maybe a yoga class on youtube. Or one of
those adult coloring books with swear words in it.
Make sure you do at least 1 fun thing a day to keep
1 Thing to NOT Do
Don't be hard on yourself. You are doing a great job. You are balancing a lot: work, family, people’s annoying
habits and I would call getting through the day a win. We’re in unprecedented times
and in the end if your house is a mess, you can’t get google classroom to work and
English is still the only language you speak, YOU WIN. I am proud of you.
Pro tip: Get everyone to agree to follow whoever wins #1 or #2 ahead of time without fussing.
#1 - Flip A Coin.
#2 - Rock, Paper, Scissors
#3 - Share. Pete the Cat says sharing is cool!
#4 - Take Turns.
#5 - Take a Deep Breath and Count to 10. A great tool to use when you feel yourself starting to lose control of your feelings.
#6 - Walk Away. Is someone getting on your nerves? Leave the room.
#7 - Ignore. You don't have to engage with someone annoying.
#1 - Cooking. Get out that pumpkin spice cookie mix from the back of your newly organized pantry.
#2 - Read a Book. Read a chapter book aloud as a family or have everyone read together quietly. We're reading the first Harry Potter and then plan to watch the movie after we finish the book.
#3 - Do a Puzzle. 1000 piece Beatles puzzle from Pop-pop is our favorite.
#4 - Draw a Picture. Get out those crayons and markers and get creative. Maybe some sidewalk chalk outside.
#5 - Have a Dance Party. Ask Alexa to play some classic 90s. Kidzbop Kidz is a fan favorite.
#6 - Play a Game. Need to kill a few hours? Monopoly is the best choice. So many card games too- war, solitaire, black jack, go fish, rummy, 7 card stud.
#7 - Play Hide and Seek In The House. Never telling my kids my super secret hiding spot. (In the shower with the curtain drawn hahaha)
#8 - Make Slime. Make your own or play with glittery mermaid slime.
#9 - Meditation. Great way to relax when you need a break throughout the day or to wind down before bed.
#10 - Work Out With Household Items. Get out those cans and sacks of rice.
#11 - Play Dress Up. Get out your Halloween costumes! What are you doing to be for this coming Halloween?
#12 - Legos. Have a lego contest: biggest tower, strongest bridge, most creative.
#13 - Play With Paper. Make a paper football, a fortune teller or a paper airplane.
Hi everyone, I just wanted to give my own message about the hard times everyone is facing currently due to coronavirus. There is alot of fear and uncertainty right now and I am right there with you.
I want to assure you that the pause happening right now at Edgewater Acupuncture is temporary. We will be re-evaluating the situation on a daily basis and take things over the next 2 weeks as they come and re-open the clinic as soon as possible. In the meantime I will be hanging out with my kids, reading books, doing puzzles, going on hikes and doing my best to live in the moment. I will be thinking about you all every day because I love you guys so very much. I love that one of my 81 year old patients this week wanted to deliver food for others because she felt healthy and energetic and wanted to be of service. I love that a couple of you were down right mad that the clinic is closing because I know that means you all need us. And I need you too. Somehow I know in my heart we will get through this. Please be safe and take care of each other.
Over the next two weeks I will be putting out some videos about stress relieving activities you can do at home. My kids really want to show everyone how to properly wash their hands and my son is dying to teach more people about pokemon. I will also be offering free 10 minute phone consultations to anyone who needs to talk, vent or ask a question. Maybe we can just breathe together or commiserate. I’m here for you all even though I’m at home.
Acupuncture is my love and it gives me great joy that you trust me to treat you. I love watching people come in grumpy and leave smiling. I love watching people come in hunched over and leave standing straight up. I love it when a patient who used to rarely leave her home forgets an appointment because she was at bridge club. I want to thank all of you for giving me the privilege of serving you over the last 10 years and I look forward to continuing this work over the next decade.
Meaghan Massella, M.Ac, L.Ac, Dipl. Ac (NCCAOM) is an acupuncturist, business owner and mother of 2.